1 00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:08,047 Professor Friedman, thank you so much 2 00:00:08,048 --> 00:00:09,465 for agreeing to meet with us. 3 00:00:09,466 --> 00:00:11,134 I'm sure you have much better things 4 00:00:11,135 --> 00:00:12,260 to be doing with your time. 5 00:00:12,261 --> 00:00:14,220 - I do. - Right. Well, 6 00:00:14,221 --> 00:00:18,349 I'm afraid we have some potentially upsetting news. 7 00:00:18,350 --> 00:00:22,689 You see, Brian and I are... involved. 8 00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:26,441 - Uh, romantically. - That's it? 9 00:00:26,442 --> 00:00:27,942 I-I thought you were gonna tell me 10 00:00:27,943 --> 00:00:29,110 you plagiarized something 11 00:00:29,111 --> 00:00:30,236 or did a hit-and-run. 12 00:00:30,237 --> 00:00:31,946 Oh, uh, it's just you said 13 00:00:31,947 --> 00:00:32,989 you don't like it when students 14 00:00:32,990 --> 00:00:33,990 in your symposium date. 15 00:00:33,991 --> 00:00:35,491 Well, yeah, but I thought 16 00:00:35,492 --> 00:00:36,993 maybe you'd be normal about it 17 00:00:36,994 --> 00:00:38,077 and just do it behind my back. 18 00:00:38,078 --> 00:00:39,162 Got it. 19 00:00:39,163 --> 00:00:41,456 So, um, you don't need this 20 00:00:41,457 --> 00:00:43,458 written statement formally disclosing our relationship? 21 00:00:43,459 --> 00:00:46,294 No. Just don't let things get messy. 22 00:00:46,295 --> 00:00:48,296 You're both smart and... 23 00:00:48,297 --> 00:00:50,673 - mildly tolerable. - Thank you. 24 00:00:50,674 --> 00:00:52,467 I don't want to have to replace one of you. 25 00:00:52,468 --> 00:00:54,761 Understood. Uh, we will be careful, 26 00:00:54,762 --> 00:00:57,138 take things slow, and, um... 27 00:00:57,139 --> 00:00:58,264 just not let it get messy. 28 00:00:58,265 --> 00:01:00,476 Absolutely. No mess here. 29 00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:03,061 Sex is so much better with someone 30 00:01:03,062 --> 00:01:04,353 who stimulates your mind. 31 00:01:04,354 --> 00:01:06,981 Yeah, I agree. 32 00:01:06,982 --> 00:01:10,943 The Foucault Reader. I didn't know you were a fan. 33 00:01:10,944 --> 00:01:12,111 Yeah, I love Foucault. 34 00:01:12,112 --> 00:01:13,654 His philosophy on prison reform 35 00:01:13,655 --> 00:01:14,781 was so ahead of its time. 36 00:01:14,782 --> 00:01:18,495 You're so fucking smart. 37 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,370 Kevin, what the hell? 38 00:01:21,371 --> 00:01:23,456 Sorry. My bad, Brian. I... 39 00:01:23,457 --> 00:01:26,125 Hey, I don't think we've officially met. I'm Kevin. 40 00:01:26,126 --> 00:01:28,546 - Kevin, get out. - Okay, okay, okay. 41 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,547 Where were we? 42 00:01:31,548 --> 00:01:33,884 - Oh, yeah, Foucault. - Foucault. 43 00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:41,224 ♪ Have to let it go ♪ 44 00:01:41,225 --> 00:01:46,020 ♪ With our hands still shaking... ♪ 45 00:01:46,021 --> 00:01:47,772 Mmm, this is good. What is this? 46 00:01:47,773 --> 00:01:49,690 It's actually just whipped cream. 47 00:01:49,691 --> 00:01:52,110 It's called the puppy cup, and technically, it's for dogs, 48 00:01:52,111 --> 00:01:53,402 but they don't know who's drinking it. 49 00:01:53,403 --> 00:01:55,113 Oh, that explains why 50 00:01:55,114 --> 00:01:57,367 the name on my cup is "Bandit." 51 00:01:58,201 --> 00:01:59,700 Well, thanks for meeting up. 52 00:01:59,701 --> 00:02:01,619 I feel like things have been a bit weird between us 53 00:02:01,620 --> 00:02:04,413 ever since I've told you how many people I slept with. 54 00:02:04,414 --> 00:02:07,875 Uh, yeah, about that, I owe you an apology. 55 00:02:07,876 --> 00:02:09,961 I didn't react to that well. 56 00:02:09,962 --> 00:02:12,255 Hey, tell you what, though, say your number again, 57 00:02:12,256 --> 00:02:14,966 and I promise I'll react a lot better this time. 58 00:02:14,967 --> 00:02:16,425 - 20. - 20?! 59 00:02:16,426 --> 00:02:18,636 No way, that's, like, my favorite even number. 60 00:02:18,637 --> 00:02:20,638 Well, I'm ready to move past it if you are. 61 00:02:20,639 --> 00:02:22,557 I am. Especially now that I got tested. 62 00:02:22,558 --> 00:02:25,351 I feel a lot better knowing that I didn't catch any STIs. 63 00:02:25,352 --> 00:02:27,895 Wait, uh, what? Sorry, you mean from me? 64 00:02:27,896 --> 00:02:29,438 Yeah, but that means you're clean, too. 65 00:02:29,439 --> 00:02:30,606 So, that's good news. 66 00:02:30,607 --> 00:02:32,275 But you still should get tested 67 00:02:32,276 --> 00:02:33,943 for HPV, since there's no test for men. 68 00:02:33,944 --> 00:02:35,403 Oh, okay. 69 00:02:35,404 --> 00:02:37,282 Well, that's really, really good to know. 70 00:02:38,449 --> 00:02:40,950 Kimberly, you haven't touched your food. What's wrong? 71 00:02:40,951 --> 00:02:42,410 I lost my appetite. 72 00:02:42,411 --> 00:02:44,539 Do you know who's coming to speak at Essex? 73 00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,665 - Nathan Riggs. - Ugh, wait, 74 00:02:47,666 --> 00:02:49,667 fuck that guy. Didn't he write a book about women 75 00:02:49,668 --> 00:02:51,502 - called Baby Makers? - Yup. 76 00:02:51,503 --> 00:02:54,463 Oh, my weird, distant cousin loves him, 77 00:02:54,464 --> 00:02:56,424 which means he's really bad. 78 00:02:56,425 --> 00:02:58,092 I can't believe that Essex is giving 79 00:02:58,093 --> 00:02:59,552 this piece of shit a platform. 80 00:02:59,553 --> 00:03:01,762 Whoa. 81 00:03:01,763 --> 00:03:03,764 Bela, you just sighed so hard it blew my napkin away. 82 00:03:03,765 --> 00:03:05,641 Are you pissed about Nathan Riggs, too? 83 00:03:05,642 --> 00:03:07,685 Who? No. 84 00:03:07,686 --> 00:03:09,312 I don't know what you're talking about. 85 00:03:09,313 --> 00:03:11,355 I'm pissed because Arvind thinks I'm a dirty slut 86 00:03:11,356 --> 00:03:12,857 with a bunch of STIs. 87 00:03:12,858 --> 00:03:15,151 - He said that? - Not in so many words, 88 00:03:15,152 --> 00:03:16,819 but he did run to get tested 89 00:03:16,820 --> 00:03:18,779 as soon as I told him how many people I've slept with. 90 00:03:18,780 --> 00:03:20,198 Does he not know how often you get tested? 91 00:03:20,199 --> 00:03:21,199 I mean, no offense. 92 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:22,491 No, none taken. 93 00:03:22,492 --> 00:03:24,702 I may be a slut, but I'm an ethical slut. 94 00:03:24,703 --> 00:03:26,495 I go to the health clinic so often 95 00:03:26,496 --> 00:03:28,624 they invited me to their staff holiday party. 96 00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:31,959 The nurse there is my emergency contact. 97 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,295 Why is it that guys can brag about how many women 98 00:03:34,296 --> 00:03:35,838 they've slept with, but women can't? 99 00:03:35,839 --> 00:03:39,300 I worked hard on my numbers. Especially number eight. 100 00:03:39,301 --> 00:03:40,968 Remember that Victorian Studies major? 101 00:03:40,969 --> 00:03:44,848 I had to read so much Dickens just to get that dick in. 102 00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:48,142 Sorry, I know you're, like, upset, 103 00:03:48,143 --> 00:03:49,685 but this is the funniest you've ever been. 104 00:03:49,686 --> 00:03:51,687 Yeah, you're always trying so hard to be funny, 105 00:03:51,688 --> 00:03:53,606 but you're, like, actually being funny. 106 00:03:53,607 --> 00:03:56,317 Seriously. You know, there's a storytelling show at Sips. 107 00:03:56,318 --> 00:03:57,526 You should perform at it. 108 00:03:57,527 --> 00:03:59,487 Me? But I hate being 109 00:03:59,488 --> 00:04:02,240 the center of attention. I'll check it out. 110 00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:05,034 So, I have a big update. 111 00:04:05,035 --> 00:04:07,828 You and Canaan are officially back together? Ah! 112 00:04:07,829 --> 00:04:09,664 No, Isaiah and I just broke things off. 113 00:04:09,665 --> 00:04:11,874 - But I am seeing someone new. - What? 114 00:04:11,875 --> 00:04:15,253 - I'm gonna start therapy. - Ugh, that's amazing. - Wow! Good for you. 115 00:04:15,254 --> 00:04:16,837 Yeah, I don't know if you guys noticed, 116 00:04:16,838 --> 00:04:18,297 but I've been feeling kind of overwhelmed lately. 117 00:04:18,298 --> 00:04:19,507 - Oh... - No way. - What? 118 00:04:19,508 --> 00:04:21,425 - Hmm... - Oh, hmm. 119 00:04:21,426 --> 00:04:23,678 Okay, damn, so you did notice. 120 00:04:23,679 --> 00:04:25,054 I guess it's a good thing I'm going. 121 00:04:25,055 --> 00:04:26,264 Therapy is really important. 122 00:04:26,265 --> 00:04:27,515 I think everyone should do it. 123 00:04:27,516 --> 00:04:28,683 I can't yet because 124 00:04:28,684 --> 00:04:30,184 I'm still gathering my mistakes, 125 00:04:30,185 --> 00:04:31,352 so it would be a waste right now, 126 00:04:31,353 --> 00:04:33,773 but I'm happy you're going. 127 00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:38,734 Well, girls, I have a little treat for everyone. 128 00:04:38,735 --> 00:04:42,321 These are $10 gift cards to the frozen yogurt shop. 129 00:04:42,322 --> 00:04:44,031 Aw, you shouldn't have. 130 00:04:44,032 --> 00:04:46,075 But also, why did you? 131 00:04:46,076 --> 00:04:49,245 Um, because I'd like for you to use them tonight, 132 00:04:49,246 --> 00:04:51,372 so that I can have the room to myself. 133 00:04:51,373 --> 00:04:53,165 For a very special reason. 134 00:04:53,166 --> 00:04:54,625 - Oh, my God. - For sex? 135 00:04:54,626 --> 00:04:56,711 So that I can be one with Cooper. 136 00:04:56,712 --> 00:04:59,046 - Oh, wow, the wording. - Oh, my God, this is incredible. 137 00:04:59,047 --> 00:05:00,881 What positions are you gonna do? I can help you. 138 00:05:00,882 --> 00:05:02,758 I have a Google Doc full of my favorites. 139 00:05:02,759 --> 00:05:04,677 - I'll share it right now. - No, I'm all set. 140 00:05:04,678 --> 00:05:06,762 I'm ready. I worked all morning to set up my room 141 00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:09,056 to be the perfect place for my first time. 142 00:05:09,057 --> 00:05:11,559 - That's really sweet. - I'm so happy for you. 143 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:13,396 Yeah, let me show you. 144 00:05:15,898 --> 00:05:18,607 - Don't you just love it? - Wow. 145 00:05:18,608 --> 00:05:21,819 It's exactly how I've always imagined it. 146 00:05:21,820 --> 00:05:22,862 Isn't it perfect? 147 00:05:22,863 --> 00:05:24,155 - Uh-huh. - Mm... 148 00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:26,198 It's very... princess. 149 00:05:26,199 --> 00:05:28,868 Thank you. And this isn't even the full effect. 150 00:05:28,869 --> 00:05:30,578 I've also prepared a playlist of songs 151 00:05:30,579 --> 00:05:33,080 from the most romantic Disney kissing scenes. 152 00:05:33,081 --> 00:05:36,709 - And are you looking for feedback? - Not really. 153 00:05:36,710 --> 00:05:38,210 - I love it! - It's great. - How cool! 154 00:05:38,211 --> 00:05:40,463 Okay, well, I should get going. 155 00:05:40,464 --> 00:05:42,131 I don't want to cry yet. 156 00:05:42,132 --> 00:05:44,258 Oh... Okay. 157 00:05:44,259 --> 00:05:46,260 Yet? 158 00:05:46,261 --> 00:05:48,679 ♪ I just want another dance with you. ♪ 159 00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:50,598 So, I'd love to avoid 160 00:05:50,599 --> 00:05:51,932 talking about my mom, my dad, 161 00:05:51,933 --> 00:05:54,560 and anyone I've dated, past or present. 162 00:05:54,561 --> 00:05:56,145 Oh, and childhood traumas involving pets. 163 00:05:56,146 --> 00:05:57,772 Got it. Yeah. 164 00:05:57,773 --> 00:06:01,108 Um, that leaves me with a lot to, uh, not work with. 165 00:06:01,109 --> 00:06:02,610 Is it normal to start therapy 166 00:06:02,611 --> 00:06:04,153 by listing what you don't want to talk about? 167 00:06:04,154 --> 00:06:05,613 Around here, we don't really use 168 00:06:05,614 --> 00:06:06,697 the word "normal." 169 00:06:06,698 --> 00:06:09,283 So, um, is it common? 170 00:06:09,284 --> 00:06:11,077 - No. - Got it. 171 00:06:11,078 --> 00:06:13,329 So, Whitney, uh, what brought you in today? 172 00:06:13,330 --> 00:06:15,956 Oh, uh, right. 173 00:06:15,957 --> 00:06:19,960 I guess I've just been feeling overwhelmed 174 00:06:19,961 --> 00:06:21,796 for, like, months. 175 00:06:21,797 --> 00:06:25,549 Between my classes and labs and practices and games 176 00:06:25,550 --> 00:06:27,968 and friendships, I just, I feel like I have more things 177 00:06:27,969 --> 00:06:29,929 to do than I can possibly get done. 178 00:06:29,930 --> 00:06:31,680 And sometimes the stress of it all 179 00:06:31,681 --> 00:06:32,807 makes me panic so badly 180 00:06:32,808 --> 00:06:34,350 that I can't think straight, 181 00:06:34,351 --> 00:06:35,976 and all of the things that I have to do 182 00:06:35,977 --> 00:06:37,144 just keep piling higher, 183 00:06:37,145 --> 00:06:39,772 and I just want a little break. 184 00:06:39,773 --> 00:06:42,024 Yeah. And what's stopping you from that? 185 00:06:42,025 --> 00:06:43,651 Oh, from taking a break? 186 00:06:43,652 --> 00:06:45,986 Uh... I don't know, everything. 187 00:06:45,987 --> 00:06:47,822 Just 'cause I want something doesn't mean I can have it. 188 00:06:47,823 --> 00:06:49,532 Well, you keep saying want, 189 00:06:49,533 --> 00:06:52,243 but it sounds like it's something you need. 190 00:06:52,244 --> 00:06:53,244 What's the difference? 191 00:06:53,245 --> 00:06:54,662 Well, for example, 192 00:06:54,663 --> 00:06:56,872 I want to eat at Arby's for every meal, 193 00:06:56,873 --> 00:06:59,500 but I need to fit into a tight karate gi 194 00:06:59,501 --> 00:07:00,626 for my blue belt test. 195 00:07:00,627 --> 00:07:02,086 So, I will eat at Arby's 196 00:07:02,087 --> 00:07:03,295 afterwards to celebrate. 197 00:07:03,296 --> 00:07:05,506 - Does that make sense? - No. 198 00:07:05,507 --> 00:07:07,258 You need a day off. 199 00:07:07,259 --> 00:07:08,717 I can't do that. 200 00:07:08,718 --> 00:07:10,010 My soccer team is in the playoffs, 201 00:07:10,011 --> 00:07:11,512 my coach would never go for that. 202 00:07:11,513 --> 00:07:12,888 Whitney, you know, 203 00:07:12,889 --> 00:07:15,015 when you tell someone what you need, 204 00:07:15,016 --> 00:07:17,560 their reaction shows you a lot about them. 205 00:07:17,561 --> 00:07:20,020 A day off is not a big ask. 206 00:07:20,021 --> 00:07:21,522 I take them all the time. 207 00:07:21,523 --> 00:07:23,065 Take one every year for my dog's birthday. 208 00:07:23,066 --> 00:07:26,193 - I like that. - So does my dog. 209 00:07:26,194 --> 00:07:28,195 Yeah, okay. 210 00:07:28,196 --> 00:07:31,784 Okay, I-I will... take a day. 211 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,787 Wow. So that was therapy? 212 00:07:36,788 --> 00:07:40,749 Uh, no, you actually still have 43 minutes to fill. 213 00:07:40,750 --> 00:07:42,543 Should we talk about your parents' divorce? 214 00:07:42,544 --> 00:07:44,128 I didn't tell you my parents were divorced. 215 00:07:44,129 --> 00:07:46,088 I can just always tell. 216 00:07:46,089 --> 00:07:47,966 Ah. 217 00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:54,305 Taylor! God, you missed 218 00:07:54,306 --> 00:07:55,890 such a good FAF meeting today. 219 00:07:55,891 --> 00:07:57,892 We sang "Happy Birthday" to that really quiet girl 220 00:07:57,893 --> 00:07:59,768 - whose name everyone forgets. - Mavis? 221 00:07:59,769 --> 00:08:02,062 Is that it? God, I literally just looked this up. 222 00:08:02,063 --> 00:08:04,106 On some level, I am going to miss 223 00:08:04,107 --> 00:08:06,775 - those boring meetings. - What do you mean miss? 224 00:08:06,776 --> 00:08:10,529 Oh, I am leaving the dorms. I'm moving in with Ash. 225 00:08:10,530 --> 00:08:11,947 A bunch of space just opened up 226 00:08:11,948 --> 00:08:13,699 at my place because my roommate 227 00:08:13,700 --> 00:08:16,577 finally got called up to Cirque du Soleil. 228 00:08:16,578 --> 00:08:17,872 Someone fell. 229 00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:21,415 Uh, Ash, could you excuse us for a moment? 230 00:08:21,416 --> 00:08:22,919 Oh, yeah. 231 00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:27,254 You're moving out of North Conn? 232 00:08:27,255 --> 00:08:29,006 Taylor, this is crazy. 233 00:08:29,007 --> 00:08:30,257 Is it? 234 00:08:30,258 --> 00:08:31,675 Or is it crazy to keep living 235 00:08:31,676 --> 00:08:32,885 with my straight roommate 236 00:08:32,886 --> 00:08:34,595 who I was briefly in love with 237 00:08:34,596 --> 00:08:38,349 but got rejected by mid-kiss at a gay rodeo? 238 00:08:38,350 --> 00:08:40,059 Okay, fair point, but 239 00:08:40,060 --> 00:08:42,436 don't you think it's a little early to move in with Ash? 240 00:08:42,437 --> 00:08:45,439 Aren't you supposed to be avoiding major life changes 241 00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:47,107 in the midst of your sobriety? 242 00:08:47,108 --> 00:08:48,692 This is like trading one kind of obsession for another. 243 00:08:48,693 --> 00:08:50,694 That is ridiculous. 244 00:08:50,695 --> 00:08:52,821 Ash is nothing like alcohol. 245 00:08:52,822 --> 00:08:54,615 She has never made me piss my pants in a taxi. 246 00:08:54,616 --> 00:08:57,159 I think I know what's best for you here. 247 00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:58,744 Well, since I'm moving out of the dorm, 248 00:08:58,745 --> 00:09:00,120 you're not gonna be my FAF anymore, 249 00:09:00,121 --> 00:09:02,790 so kind of doesn't matter what you think. 250 00:09:02,791 --> 00:09:05,584 So, should we all grab some food together? 251 00:09:05,585 --> 00:09:07,296 It feels like grilled cheese weather. 252 00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:09,797 Are you okay? 253 00:09:09,798 --> 00:09:11,966 - What-what did I miss? - We're fine. 254 00:09:11,967 --> 00:09:13,801 Thank you for your help, Bela. 255 00:09:13,802 --> 00:09:16,470 You can have whatever I've left in the dorm. 256 00:09:16,471 --> 00:09:18,722 Like that weird radio 257 00:09:18,723 --> 00:09:20,724 that you gave me, it keeps beeping. 258 00:09:20,725 --> 00:09:22,810 The carbon monoxide detector? 259 00:09:22,811 --> 00:09:24,186 Is that what that is? 260 00:09:24,187 --> 00:09:25,521 Okay, you really need to check on it. 261 00:09:25,522 --> 00:09:26,772 It's very upset. 262 00:09:26,773 --> 00:09:29,525 That's really scary. 263 00:09:29,526 --> 00:09:31,986 ♪ Like I'm famous ♪ 264 00:09:31,987 --> 00:09:34,071 ♪ Who doesn't love a little chaos? ♪ 265 00:09:34,072 --> 00:09:36,032 ♪ Like a movie right before the first kiss, kiss ♪ 266 00:09:38,202 --> 00:09:40,786 ♪ Anticipation got me living in bliss, bliss ♪ 267 00:09:40,787 --> 00:09:44,999 ♪ Dolled up, all my friends, call me up, night's young ♪ 268 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:47,169 ♪ We want to have fun ♪ 269 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:51,090 ♪ La, la-la, la-la, la-la ♪ 270 00:09:51,882 --> 00:09:53,090 ♪ La-la, la-la ♪ 271 00:09:53,091 --> 00:09:54,800 ♪ Want to have fun ♪ 272 00:09:54,801 --> 00:09:57,720 ♪ La, la-la, la-la, la-la ♪ 273 00:09:57,721 --> 00:09:59,680 ♪ La-la, la-la ♪ 274 00:09:59,681 --> 00:10:01,181 ♪ We want to have fun ♪ 275 00:10:01,182 --> 00:10:04,852 ♪ La, la-la, la-la, la-la... ♪ 276 00:10:04,853 --> 00:10:06,270 Oh, hey, sign-up sheet's over there. 277 00:10:06,271 --> 00:10:08,314 No, I'm actually just watching the show. 278 00:10:08,315 --> 00:10:09,732 Really? 279 00:10:09,733 --> 00:10:11,358 We don't get a lot of real audience members. 280 00:10:11,359 --> 00:10:13,694 Everyone in the crowd is usually waiting to get onstage. 281 00:10:13,695 --> 00:10:14,820 Except Soup Man. 282 00:10:14,821 --> 00:10:16,822 Steer clear of the Soup Man. 283 00:10:16,823 --> 00:10:18,949 - Does Sips sell soup? - They do not. 284 00:10:18,950 --> 00:10:21,535 Let's stop saying the word "soup." He might come over. 285 00:10:21,536 --> 00:10:22,995 So, how'd you hear about the show? 286 00:10:22,996 --> 00:10:24,538 Uh, my friend. I used to do comedy last year, 287 00:10:24,539 --> 00:10:26,165 so I thought I'd check it out. 288 00:10:26,166 --> 00:10:29,710 If you do comedy, we could really use you onstage. 289 00:10:29,711 --> 00:10:31,545 We got a lot of people who like to do loud, 290 00:10:31,546 --> 00:10:33,005 a-rhythmic slam poetry, 291 00:10:33,006 --> 00:10:34,381 which is as unfunny as it sounds. 292 00:10:34,382 --> 00:10:35,716 I'll think about it. 293 00:10:35,717 --> 00:10:37,259 Well, I'd better get the show started. 294 00:10:37,260 --> 00:10:38,677 We have four hours of stories to get through. 295 00:10:38,678 --> 00:10:40,387 Wow, that's a lot of storytellers. 296 00:10:40,388 --> 00:10:41,972 No, that's the worst part. 297 00:10:41,973 --> 00:10:43,974 Just a few really long, bad ones. 298 00:10:43,975 --> 00:10:46,143 - Oh, no. - Yeah. 299 00:10:46,144 --> 00:10:49,855 Okay, let's get started. Please take your seats. 300 00:10:49,856 --> 00:10:53,317 Welcome to the show, everyone. I'm your host Haley. 301 00:10:53,318 --> 00:10:54,902 And remember, I'm gay, 302 00:10:54,903 --> 00:10:57,279 so using the bathroom during any of my stories is 303 00:10:57,280 --> 00:10:58,573 technically a hate crime. 304 00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:01,241 And if you feel a yawn coming on, 305 00:11:01,242 --> 00:11:02,786 please hold it for the next performer. 306 00:11:04,413 --> 00:11:07,247 ♪ I was young, I thought of love ♪ 307 00:11:07,248 --> 00:11:09,500 ♪ As something like a dream... ♪ 308 00:11:09,501 --> 00:11:11,671 Oh, Cooper. 309 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:16,590 I'm so glad you're my first. 310 00:11:16,591 --> 00:11:18,010 Yeah, me too. 311 00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,427 Mm. 312 00:11:20,428 --> 00:11:22,390 What's-what's on your window? 313 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,973 Oh, it's a print of a sunset. 314 00:11:24,974 --> 00:11:28,187 I always imagined I'd lose my virginity at magic hour. 315 00:11:29,021 --> 00:11:30,688 - Got it. Okay. - Yeah. 316 00:11:30,689 --> 00:11:31,982 Yeah. 317 00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:37,113 - I'm ready. - Oh. 318 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:41,949 I'm really, really ready. 319 00:11:41,950 --> 00:11:44,787 I'm definitely, uh... 320 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:48,290 not ready. 321 00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,082 Like, I'm very unready. 322 00:11:50,083 --> 00:11:51,291 What's wrong? Is it me? 323 00:11:51,292 --> 00:11:52,710 No. No. No, no, no. 324 00:11:52,711 --> 00:11:54,130 Maybe? 325 00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:56,171 Like, it's not you, 326 00:11:56,172 --> 00:11:58,340 there's just kind of a lot going on in here. 327 00:11:58,341 --> 00:11:59,675 Is it the twinkle lights? 328 00:11:59,676 --> 00:12:00,759 I could switch them to disco mode. 329 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:02,678 Um... Oh. 330 00:12:02,679 --> 00:12:05,180 Wow, that's something. 331 00:12:05,181 --> 00:12:09,311 Well, let's see if that made you a little more ready. 332 00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:11,480 Oh, not yet, okay. 333 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,322 Guys! Look what just came in. 334 00:12:22,323 --> 00:12:24,199 It's my new... 335 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,993 weighted blanket. 336 00:12:25,994 --> 00:12:27,661 That looks really heavy. 337 00:12:27,662 --> 00:12:30,914 Yeah, the therapist suggested I get one for my anxiety, 338 00:12:30,915 --> 00:12:32,332 so I looked online and found a company 339 00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:33,625 that sells an 80-pounder. 340 00:12:33,626 --> 00:12:35,753 I'm gonna smush myself to calm. 341 00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:37,337 It sounds like therapy went well. 342 00:12:37,338 --> 00:12:39,506 It did. Yeah, the therapist was so helpful. 343 00:12:39,507 --> 00:12:40,841 He encouraged me 344 00:12:40,842 --> 00:12:42,468 to take today off from my responsibilities 345 00:12:42,469 --> 00:12:43,802 to just relax. 346 00:12:43,803 --> 00:12:45,220 Oh, that's great. I love that for you. 347 00:12:45,221 --> 00:12:47,222 - Yeah. - You really deserve it. 348 00:12:47,223 --> 00:12:49,850 Huh! Okay. 349 00:12:49,851 --> 00:12:51,727 Yeah, this is good. 350 00:12:51,728 --> 00:12:54,062 Definitely not doing anything today 'cause I can't move. 351 00:12:54,063 --> 00:12:56,398 Does anyone want a bunch of twinkly string lights? 352 00:12:56,399 --> 00:12:58,609 Since I'm remaining a virgin, I won't be needing them. 353 00:12:58,610 --> 00:12:59,610 It didn't happen? 354 00:12:59,611 --> 00:13:01,195 No. 355 00:13:01,196 --> 00:13:05,073 Maybe he's just not as into me as I thought he was. 356 00:13:05,074 --> 00:13:07,242 You did have a lot going on in your room. 357 00:13:07,243 --> 00:13:09,703 Maybe just give him some space and check in later? 358 00:13:09,704 --> 00:13:11,955 I wish I could avoid him, but I have to see him again 359 00:13:11,956 --> 00:13:13,373 in two hours for rehearsal. 360 00:13:13,374 --> 00:13:15,042 The key to successfully 361 00:13:15,043 --> 00:13:18,337 avoiding someone is to show up late, 362 00:13:18,338 --> 00:13:19,505 leave early, 363 00:13:19,506 --> 00:13:21,006 and never make eye contact. 364 00:13:21,007 --> 00:13:22,716 People do it to me all the time. Really works. 365 00:13:22,717 --> 00:13:25,844 Okay. I don't think I can pull that off, but I'll try. 366 00:13:25,845 --> 00:13:28,680 Well, I have something exciting to share. 367 00:13:28,681 --> 00:13:30,182 I sent my first ever nude pic. 368 00:13:30,183 --> 00:13:31,850 - What? - Kimberly Finkle! 369 00:13:31,851 --> 00:13:34,019 I actually really enjoyed the experience. 370 00:13:34,020 --> 00:13:36,438 It was very empowering to celebrate my body, 371 00:13:36,439 --> 00:13:38,899 especially my boobs and both nipples. 372 00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:40,400 And, of course, I kept my face out of it 373 00:13:40,401 --> 00:13:41,777 and took it against 374 00:13:41,778 --> 00:13:43,153 a nondescript section of my beige wall. 375 00:13:43,154 --> 00:13:46,031 Beige? Getting sexier by the minute. 376 00:13:46,032 --> 00:13:48,075 Taking nudes is the best. 377 00:13:48,076 --> 00:13:50,077 Sometimes I set a slideshow of mine to music 378 00:13:50,078 --> 00:13:51,495 and just watch it back like they're photos 379 00:13:51,496 --> 00:13:52,663 from a family vacation. 380 00:13:52,664 --> 00:13:54,456 I took, like, 72 test shots, 381 00:13:54,457 --> 00:13:56,585 but I'm really proud of the one I sent. 382 00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,586 Can I... show you guys? 383 00:13:59,587 --> 00:14:01,880 - Yes! - Of course! 384 00:14:01,881 --> 00:14:04,217 Yay. 385 00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:07,386 Good God, your boobs are stunning. 386 00:14:07,387 --> 00:14:10,933 This is inspiring. Should I send a nude to Cooper? 387 00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:13,559 Right, no. Give him space. 388 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:15,686 - Uh-oh. - What? 389 00:14:15,687 --> 00:14:17,271 Kimberly, this is a live photo. 390 00:14:17,272 --> 00:14:18,856 When I hold my finger down, it shows your face. 391 00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:20,315 Are you fucking kidding me?! 392 00:14:20,316 --> 00:14:22,568 Why are live photos even a thing? 393 00:14:22,569 --> 00:14:24,069 Photos shouldn't move, they're photos. 394 00:14:24,070 --> 00:14:25,279 It's fine. 395 00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:27,281 I can barely tell it's you. 396 00:14:27,282 --> 00:14:28,782 Except for the high school diploma in the background. 397 00:14:28,783 --> 00:14:30,284 Oh, my God. No! 398 00:14:30,285 --> 00:14:32,369 I've spent so long trying to keep my record clean, 399 00:14:32,370 --> 00:14:35,122 and now my face and boobs are basically on Getty Images. 400 00:14:35,123 --> 00:14:36,832 No, don't spiral. It's just one guy. 401 00:14:36,833 --> 00:14:39,543 And I'm sure if you ask Brian he'll delete the photo. 402 00:14:39,544 --> 00:14:41,879 Yeah, and if you need help calming down before then, 403 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:44,715 just slide in. Ow. 404 00:14:44,716 --> 00:14:45,924 How did that hurt my hand? 405 00:14:45,925 --> 00:14:47,301 I feel like they sewed metal 406 00:14:47,302 --> 00:14:49,262 into the lining or something. 407 00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:52,931 What's up? 408 00:14:52,932 --> 00:14:54,349 - You okay? - Yeah. 409 00:14:54,350 --> 00:14:56,562 It's just about what I sent earlier. 410 00:14:57,479 --> 00:14:59,062 I realized my face is in the picture 411 00:14:59,063 --> 00:15:00,689 and I'm kind of freaking out. 412 00:15:00,690 --> 00:15:01,899 Can you delete it? 413 00:15:01,900 --> 00:15:04,693 Are you sure? It was really hot. 414 00:15:04,694 --> 00:15:06,653 Thanks. 415 00:15:06,654 --> 00:15:09,948 But I really would prefer if you deleted it. 416 00:15:09,949 --> 00:15:13,535 Okay, I-I'll do it later. 417 00:15:13,536 --> 00:15:15,787 I think I'd feel better if you did it now. 418 00:15:15,788 --> 00:15:17,873 In front of me. I just want to know it's gone. 419 00:15:17,874 --> 00:15:19,333 What, now? 420 00:15:19,334 --> 00:15:22,002 Do you not trust me or something? 421 00:15:22,003 --> 00:15:23,670 This feels really weird. 422 00:15:23,671 --> 00:15:25,505 I'm sorry, are you mad at me? 423 00:15:25,506 --> 00:15:26,840 Yeah, kind of. 424 00:15:26,841 --> 00:15:28,467 I was excited to see you. 425 00:15:28,468 --> 00:15:30,719 You just came in with this really off-putting energy. 426 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,180 I just don't want a naked photo of myself out there. 427 00:15:33,181 --> 00:15:34,640 What do you mean "out there"? 428 00:15:34,641 --> 00:15:37,102 You think I'm gonna send it around to people? 429 00:15:41,899 --> 00:15:43,941 Fine, it's gone. 430 00:15:43,942 --> 00:15:45,402 Thanks. 431 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,281 Okay, I guess I'll go. 432 00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:51,617 Yeah, sounds good. 433 00:15:57,414 --> 00:15:59,706 There is no greater feeling 434 00:15:59,707 --> 00:16:01,750 than when one of my drama students begins 435 00:16:01,751 --> 00:16:03,126 working professionally. 436 00:16:03,127 --> 00:16:04,878 Therefore I am thrilled to announce: 437 00:16:04,879 --> 00:16:06,213 Heather will be 438 00:16:06,214 --> 00:16:07,631 leaving Essex to compete 439 00:16:07,632 --> 00:16:09,883 on the next season of Survivor Teens. 440 00:16:09,884 --> 00:16:11,635 Of course, because she was 441 00:16:11,636 --> 00:16:13,136 the lead in the musical, 442 00:16:13,137 --> 00:16:14,888 I will have to recast her role very quickly. 443 00:16:14,889 --> 00:16:16,390 I'd like to be considered. 444 00:16:16,391 --> 00:16:17,891 Thank you for your interest. I'm not sure 445 00:16:17,892 --> 00:16:19,434 that's what's best for the show. 446 00:16:19,435 --> 00:16:21,770 Um, I know someone who would be right for the show. 447 00:16:21,771 --> 00:16:23,939 ♪ And that person ♪ 448 00:16:23,940 --> 00:16:26,358 ♪ Is me. ♪ 449 00:16:26,359 --> 00:16:29,444 I appreciate everyone's... enthusiasm, 450 00:16:29,445 --> 00:16:32,155 but I will be making this decision myself. 451 00:16:32,156 --> 00:16:33,657 I think it should be Kacey. 452 00:16:33,658 --> 00:16:35,450 I mean, respectfully. 453 00:16:35,451 --> 00:16:37,119 I think she'd make a great scene partner. 454 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:38,745 Does tech crew get a vote? 455 00:16:38,746 --> 00:16:39,746 - Lars. - Hi. 456 00:16:39,747 --> 00:16:40,789 Sorry. I know I'm only 457 00:16:40,790 --> 00:16:41,915 supposed to weigh in 458 00:16:41,916 --> 00:16:43,083 on lighting and sound stuff, 459 00:16:43,084 --> 00:16:44,626 but it should clearly be Kacey. 460 00:16:44,627 --> 00:16:46,503 Well, since everyone suddenly thinks 461 00:16:46,504 --> 00:16:48,422 this production is a democracy, 462 00:16:48,423 --> 00:16:50,841 and you all think it should be Kacey, 463 00:16:50,842 --> 00:16:52,175 then fine. 464 00:16:52,176 --> 00:16:54,094 I'd love to see her try. 465 00:16:54,095 --> 00:16:56,223 Maybe she'll rise to the challenge. 466 00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:04,146 Uh... are you okay? I haven't seen you this mad since 467 00:17:04,147 --> 00:17:07,024 Soup Man told you you look prettier when you smile. 468 00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:08,692 I'm in a mood. 469 00:17:08,693 --> 00:17:11,111 Brian and I had a weird fight over a nude I sent him. 470 00:17:11,112 --> 00:17:12,362 I asked him to delete my picture, 471 00:17:12,363 --> 00:17:14,114 and he got all gaslight-y 472 00:17:14,115 --> 00:17:16,199 and made it seem like I was being unreasonable. 473 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:18,493 - Hold on. Deleted it from what? - From his phone. 474 00:17:18,494 --> 00:17:20,162 Bitch, you never heard of the cloud? 475 00:17:20,163 --> 00:17:21,955 That pic is at least still on his computer, 476 00:17:21,956 --> 00:17:24,875 or worse, being group-jacked to by incels on the dark web. 477 00:17:24,876 --> 00:17:26,626 Oh, my God. 478 00:17:26,627 --> 00:17:28,295 I can't believe I have to go talk to him about this again. 479 00:17:28,296 --> 00:17:29,838 We left things in such a bad place. 480 00:17:29,839 --> 00:17:31,715 I'll go. Give me five minutes alone with him, 481 00:17:31,716 --> 00:17:33,258 and I will get you the answers you need. 482 00:17:33,259 --> 00:17:34,342 I know you're joking, but I... 483 00:17:34,343 --> 00:17:35,594 Oh, I'm dead serious. 484 00:17:35,595 --> 00:17:36,636 I will kick him 485 00:17:36,637 --> 00:17:37,721 in the dick, hard. 486 00:17:37,722 --> 00:17:38,805 Thank you, but physical violence 487 00:17:38,806 --> 00:17:40,223 won't be necessary. 488 00:17:40,224 --> 00:17:41,641 Al though it would be nice to have you there 489 00:17:41,642 --> 00:17:42,642 for support. 490 00:17:42,643 --> 00:17:43,727 I'm in. 491 00:17:43,728 --> 00:17:44,728 Let's go get rid of that pic 492 00:17:44,729 --> 00:17:46,521 of your tig ol' bitties. 493 00:17:46,522 --> 00:17:47,856 Not today, girl. 494 00:17:47,857 --> 00:17:49,318 Let's go. 495 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:54,362 Why do you have so much pep in your step today? 496 00:17:54,363 --> 00:17:55,864 I haven't seen you this happy 497 00:17:55,865 --> 00:17:57,324 since Bela's tie got caught in an elevator. 498 00:17:57,325 --> 00:17:58,992 I'm feeling good because I'm taking 499 00:17:58,993 --> 00:18:00,243 a day off to get my mind right. 500 00:18:00,244 --> 00:18:01,995 - Seriously? - Mm-hmm. 501 00:18:01,996 --> 00:18:03,455 Are you sure you can do that? 502 00:18:03,456 --> 00:18:04,956 Coach made me practice the day I got LASIK. 503 00:18:04,957 --> 00:18:06,416 I couldn't see shit. 504 00:18:06,417 --> 00:18:09,002 I had to rely on echolocation, like a damn bat. 505 00:18:09,003 --> 00:18:11,004 Yeah, I know Coach Hale can be strict, but I'm sure 506 00:18:11,005 --> 00:18:13,215 he'll understand once he knows how much I need this. 507 00:18:13,216 --> 00:18:15,008 Absolutely not. 508 00:18:15,009 --> 00:18:16,134 No days off. 509 00:18:16,135 --> 00:18:17,844 Yeah, I know that's, like, 510 00:18:17,845 --> 00:18:20,055 your motto or whatever, but this isn't optional for me. 511 00:18:20,056 --> 00:18:21,681 I really need this. 512 00:18:21,682 --> 00:18:23,350 For my mental health. 513 00:18:23,351 --> 00:18:25,143 Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a joke. 514 00:18:25,144 --> 00:18:28,480 Look, being in a bad mood isn't an excuse to miss practice. 515 00:18:28,481 --> 00:18:31,233 I'm not in a bad mood. 516 00:18:31,234 --> 00:18:33,068 Okay, I've done everything you've asked of me. 517 00:18:33,069 --> 00:18:34,486 I-I played through an injury. 518 00:18:34,487 --> 00:18:36,780 Okay, but if you're not at practice, 519 00:18:36,781 --> 00:18:38,490 you can't start in the playoffs. 520 00:18:38,491 --> 00:18:39,616 What? 521 00:18:39,617 --> 00:18:41,368 I mean, it's just one practice. 522 00:18:41,369 --> 00:18:42,911 And resting's gonna help me play better. 523 00:18:42,912 --> 00:18:44,579 Sorry, my answer is "no." 524 00:18:44,580 --> 00:18:45,997 Wow. Okay. 525 00:18:45,998 --> 00:18:47,582 Uh, well, then I guess don't worry 526 00:18:47,583 --> 00:18:49,711 - about benching me because I quit. - Well... 527 00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:58,635 Oh, man. 528 00:18:58,636 --> 00:19:00,554 Whoa, whoa. Whitney, are you okay? 529 00:19:00,555 --> 00:19:02,055 Huh? I'm fine. 530 00:19:02,056 --> 00:19:03,890 I-I just, um, 531 00:19:03,891 --> 00:19:06,893 I just quit soccer, and I think I'm having a panic attack. 532 00:19:06,894 --> 00:19:09,437 Okay, okay. Uh, well, just-just cool down. 533 00:19:09,438 --> 00:19:11,690 Just-just, uh, breathe, just... 534 00:19:11,691 --> 00:19:12,941 Okay. 535 00:19:12,942 --> 00:19:14,734 I need you to lay on me. 536 00:19:14,735 --> 00:19:16,695 - Huh? - My weighted blanket's in my room. 537 00:19:16,696 --> 00:19:18,446 - Do you weigh at least 80 pounds? - Yeah, yeah, I do. 538 00:19:18,447 --> 00:19:20,991 Actually, it doesn't matter. 539 00:19:20,992 --> 00:19:22,744 Get on me. Now. 540 00:19:24,079 --> 00:19:25,579 Okay. Okay. 541 00:19:25,580 --> 00:19:28,248 - Like this? - Yes. 542 00:19:28,249 --> 00:19:29,749 Okay, this is good. This is helping. 543 00:19:29,750 --> 00:19:31,211 Okay. I'm glad. 544 00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:35,255 Uh, is there anything else I can...? 545 00:19:35,256 --> 00:19:37,507 Shh. Shh. Weighted blankets don't talk. 546 00:19:37,508 --> 00:19:39,803 Okay. 547 00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:47,767 What are you writing? 548 00:19:47,768 --> 00:19:49,060 You've been working for, like, an hour, 549 00:19:49,061 --> 00:19:50,103 and you haven't 550 00:19:50,104 --> 00:19:51,438 checked your phone once. 551 00:19:51,439 --> 00:19:53,106 I'm getting... manifesto energy. 552 00:19:53,107 --> 00:19:55,859 I am putting together ideas 553 00:19:55,860 --> 00:19:57,611 for a storytelling show. 554 00:19:57,612 --> 00:19:58,820 Oh. 555 00:19:58,821 --> 00:19:59,946 I love stories. 556 00:19:59,947 --> 00:20:01,990 Except scary ones. Too scary. 557 00:20:01,991 --> 00:20:03,450 So, what's your story about? 558 00:20:03,451 --> 00:20:05,452 Well, um... your reaction 559 00:20:05,453 --> 00:20:07,537 to my body count helped me realize 560 00:20:07,538 --> 00:20:09,789 that I have all these funny sex stories, 561 00:20:09,790 --> 00:20:12,626 and... I want to start sharing them. 562 00:20:12,627 --> 00:20:15,170 Like one time I hooked up with a guy in the computer lab, 563 00:20:15,171 --> 00:20:18,381 and afterwards, there was a full keyboard indented on my butt. 564 00:20:18,382 --> 00:20:21,343 Um, why would you want to talk about that 565 00:20:21,344 --> 00:20:23,096 in front of an audience? 566 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:28,477 Because I think it would be funny and thought-provoking. 567 00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,980 Okay, well, I just don't know if I'm comfortable 568 00:20:33,981 --> 00:20:35,982 with the entire campus... 569 00:20:35,983 --> 00:20:38,652 knowing the graphic details of my girlfriend's sex life. 570 00:20:38,653 --> 00:20:40,654 First of all, I'll be very surprised 571 00:20:40,655 --> 00:20:43,323 if everyone on campus shows up for a storytelling show. 572 00:20:43,324 --> 00:20:46,409 And why would people judge you based on my past? 573 00:20:46,410 --> 00:20:48,536 If anything, they'll judge me. 574 00:20:48,537 --> 00:20:49,955 Kind of like you did. 575 00:20:49,956 --> 00:20:51,915 Okay, so, you're still mad about that? 576 00:20:51,916 --> 00:20:54,668 No, it's fine. I'm just... I'm really excited about the show, 577 00:20:54,669 --> 00:20:57,087 and I was hoping that you would be, too. 578 00:20:57,088 --> 00:20:59,673 I am not. 579 00:20:59,674 --> 00:21:01,049 I'm sorry, Bela. 580 00:21:01,050 --> 00:21:02,968 I really like you. 581 00:21:02,969 --> 00:21:05,387 But I-I don't know if I can see a future with someone who's okay 582 00:21:05,388 --> 00:21:07,514 putting private things out in the open like this. 583 00:21:07,515 --> 00:21:10,016 That's me, though. 584 00:21:10,017 --> 00:21:12,435 I'm an open person, and I need to be with someone 585 00:21:12,436 --> 00:21:14,481 who doesn't think less of me for it. 586 00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:16,523 What are you saying? You're... 587 00:21:16,524 --> 00:21:18,318 You're saying we should break up? 588 00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:21,613 I guess so. 589 00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,410 Bye, Arvind. 590 00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:32,122 Hey, sorry to show up unannounced. 591 00:21:32,123 --> 00:21:34,082 Oh. Hi, Kevin. 592 00:21:34,083 --> 00:21:35,959 - I didn't know you'd be here. - Oh. 593 00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:37,502 Hey. Don't mind me. 594 00:21:37,503 --> 00:21:38,878 I'm just messing around with my kinetic sand. 595 00:21:38,879 --> 00:21:41,131 I'm building a perfectly to-scale model 596 00:21:41,132 --> 00:21:42,424 of a Scottish castle that... 597 00:21:42,425 --> 00:21:43,883 Oh, no. The antechamber fell. 598 00:21:43,884 --> 00:21:45,969 I assume you're here to talk about yesterday? 599 00:21:45,970 --> 00:21:48,221 - Yup. - And what are you here for? 600 00:21:48,222 --> 00:21:49,639 Mostly chime-ins. 601 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,349 I have another question about my picture. 602 00:21:51,350 --> 00:21:53,351 Wait. Are you kidding? 603 00:21:53,352 --> 00:21:55,020 I figured you'd come here to apologize. 604 00:21:55,021 --> 00:21:57,856 Apologize?! This little bitch is out of his mind. 605 00:21:57,857 --> 00:21:59,524 Continue, Kimberly. 606 00:21:59,525 --> 00:22:01,735 So, I know you deleted my picture from your phone, 607 00:22:01,736 --> 00:22:03,737 but I don't know if you have any other copies 608 00:22:03,738 --> 00:22:05,697 - backed up somewhere. - God, you're so paranoid. 609 00:22:05,698 --> 00:22:08,074 What is it exactly you think I'd do with this photo? 610 00:22:08,075 --> 00:22:10,160 Kevin, shut the fuck up. 611 00:22:10,161 --> 00:22:13,621 Wait. What was that about? Did you show him my photo? 612 00:22:13,622 --> 00:22:15,081 What?! No, Kimberly, I... 613 00:22:15,082 --> 00:22:17,542 You sound insane. Okay, you need to calm down. 614 00:22:17,543 --> 00:22:19,711 Oh, I know this little ho-bag 615 00:22:19,712 --> 00:22:24,257 did not just tell an insane woman to calm down. 616 00:22:24,258 --> 00:22:25,884 Enough is enough. 617 00:22:25,885 --> 00:22:28,928 Delete all the backups in front of us right now. 618 00:22:28,929 --> 00:22:31,432 Okay. And if I don't, what are you gonna do? 619 00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:36,019 Grab his phone, use his face to unlock it. 620 00:22:36,020 --> 00:22:38,897 - Kevin! Help me! - If you fucking move, 621 00:22:38,898 --> 00:22:40,982 Kevin, my foot will be on your dick so fast, 622 00:22:40,983 --> 00:22:42,317 your balls will spin. 623 00:22:42,318 --> 00:22:43,777 Sorry, dude. You're on your own. 624 00:22:43,778 --> 00:22:45,779 Quit moving your face. 625 00:22:45,780 --> 00:22:47,989 - I'm in. - What are you doing? 626 00:22:47,990 --> 00:22:49,657 There are no more copies of that photo on my phone. 627 00:22:49,658 --> 00:22:51,201 That's not what I'm looking for. 628 00:22:51,202 --> 00:22:52,702 Okay, here it is. 629 00:22:52,703 --> 00:22:55,789 - 312-675-2454? - Wait. That's my mom's number. 630 00:22:55,790 --> 00:22:58,750 Yeah, and if you don't delete every single copy of my photo, 631 00:22:58,751 --> 00:23:00,543 I bet she'd be really disappointed to find out 632 00:23:00,544 --> 00:23:02,379 that her son is a disgusting scumbag. 633 00:23:02,380 --> 00:23:03,630 - You wouldn't. - Oh, she would! 634 00:23:03,631 --> 00:23:05,131 She loves talking to moms. 635 00:23:05,132 --> 00:23:06,883 That's why she still has a Facebook account. 636 00:23:06,884 --> 00:23:09,177 - Mm-hmm. - Okay, yeah. Okay. All right! 637 00:23:09,178 --> 00:23:11,596 Fine. Jesus Christ. 638 00:23:11,597 --> 00:23:13,848 Look, I'll... I'll delete the backups. 639 00:23:13,849 --> 00:23:16,643 This just proves my point. You are crazy. 640 00:23:16,644 --> 00:23:18,603 You know what? I'm okay with that. 641 00:23:18,604 --> 00:23:20,146 I like being a little crazy. 642 00:23:20,147 --> 00:23:21,398 - Me too, bitch. - Yeah. 643 00:23:21,399 --> 00:23:23,316 Livin' the vida loca. 644 00:23:23,317 --> 00:23:24,859 ♪ Ah, da-da, da-da, da ♪ 645 00:23:24,860 --> 00:23:26,778 ♪ Bitch, what's up? Ow! ♪ 646 00:23:26,779 --> 00:23:31,241 I don't understand how one person needs this much makeup. 647 00:23:31,242 --> 00:23:32,867 Like, you have one face. 648 00:23:32,868 --> 00:23:35,870 Just so you know, those two boxes are also makeup. 649 00:23:35,871 --> 00:23:38,373 Ooh, could you pass me my lifter plump gloss? 650 00:23:38,374 --> 00:23:40,750 I honestly have no idea how to find that, 651 00:23:40,751 --> 00:23:42,669 or what part of your body it would go on. 652 00:23:42,670 --> 00:23:44,546 Okay, well, it goes on your lips, 653 00:23:44,547 --> 00:23:48,093 and it plumps them because it's spicy. 654 00:23:48,844 --> 00:23:50,677 Thank God you're moving in. I have so much to learn. 655 00:23:50,678 --> 00:23:52,429 Like, conditioner... is that... 656 00:23:52,430 --> 00:23:53,638 an everyday thing, 657 00:23:53,639 --> 00:23:55,682 or do I just use it at hotels? 658 00:23:55,683 --> 00:23:57,851 Taylor? Are you okay? 659 00:23:57,852 --> 00:24:00,186 My aunt just texted me that my mom's getting married. 660 00:24:00,187 --> 00:24:01,980 Is that bad news? 661 00:24:01,981 --> 00:24:04,899 Well, it's typical I'd find out this way 662 00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:07,152 because I haven't spoken to my mom in years. 663 00:24:07,153 --> 00:24:10,738 Well, m-maybe the wedding is a good opportunity 664 00:24:10,739 --> 00:24:12,282 for you guys to reconnect. 665 00:24:12,283 --> 00:24:14,075 Not much chance of that. 666 00:24:14,076 --> 00:24:17,370 According to my aunt, my mom's getting married tomorrow, so... 667 00:24:17,371 --> 00:24:19,831 Whoa. Shit. That sucks. 668 00:24:19,832 --> 00:24:21,833 I think I just need some air, so... 669 00:24:21,834 --> 00:24:23,918 Well, I can come with you if you want company. 670 00:24:23,919 --> 00:24:27,048 Thanks, but I would rather be alone. 671 00:24:34,890 --> 00:24:37,140 Thanks for standing up for me today at rehearsal. 672 00:24:37,141 --> 00:24:38,808 It meant a lot. 673 00:24:38,809 --> 00:24:41,019 Well, hey, I'm glad you got the role. You deserved it. 674 00:24:41,020 --> 00:24:43,480 I wasn't sure if you liked me anymore. 675 00:24:43,481 --> 00:24:47,150 Especially after we tried to have... 676 00:24:47,151 --> 00:24:49,029 sex. 677 00:24:50,030 --> 00:24:51,654 Kacey, come on. 678 00:24:51,655 --> 00:24:53,823 Obviously, I still like you. 679 00:24:53,824 --> 00:24:56,117 I like you whether or not we have sex. 680 00:24:56,118 --> 00:24:58,036 You do? 681 00:24:58,037 --> 00:24:59,913 So then why did you leave my room? 682 00:24:59,914 --> 00:25:02,207 I've never taken anyone's virginity before. 683 00:25:02,208 --> 00:25:05,251 I guess I got scared about having that responsibility. 684 00:25:05,252 --> 00:25:07,086 So, you're saying 685 00:25:07,087 --> 00:25:10,423 you weren't ready to lose my virginity? 686 00:25:10,424 --> 00:25:12,091 Yeah. 687 00:25:12,092 --> 00:25:14,010 Yeah, I guess that is what I'm saying. Is that weird? 688 00:25:14,011 --> 00:25:15,803 No. 689 00:25:15,804 --> 00:25:17,807 It's sweet. 690 00:25:19,142 --> 00:25:20,808 Are you ready now? 691 00:25:20,809 --> 00:25:23,313 I could be... if you are. 692 00:25:24,314 --> 00:25:28,274 Yeah, and I really want my first time to be with you. 693 00:25:28,275 --> 00:25:29,653 I'd like that. 694 00:25:30,654 --> 00:25:34,656 But maybe I could choose the music this time? 695 00:25:34,657 --> 00:25:38,619 Maybe something not from an animated film. 696 00:25:50,632 --> 00:25:53,299 Damn, this thing is heavy. 697 00:25:53,300 --> 00:25:56,344 I didn't know I'd have to do a dead lift just to stay warm. 698 00:25:56,345 --> 00:25:57,762 Just leave it. 699 00:25:57,763 --> 00:26:00,139 ♪ I've been waiting so long ♪ 700 00:26:00,140 --> 00:26:04,312 ♪ For something good to come ♪ 701 00:26:05,939 --> 00:26:08,189 ♪ Seasons changing ♪ 702 00:26:08,190 --> 00:26:12,360 ♪ I hope we're strong enough ♪ 703 00:26:12,361 --> 00:26:17,407 ♪ I know days are moving slow... ♪ 704 00:26:17,408 --> 00:26:18,992 So, what do you think? 705 00:26:18,993 --> 00:26:20,827 This is going to be so funny. 706 00:26:20,828 --> 00:26:22,537 I can't wait for you to perform it at the next show. 707 00:26:22,538 --> 00:26:26,207 This is great. 708 00:26:26,208 --> 00:26:31,212 ♪ After all that we've been through ♪ 709 00:26:31,213 --> 00:26:34,507 ♪ I still want to take a walk with you ♪ 710 00:26:34,508 --> 00:26:36,009 ♪ Into the garden ♪ 711 00:26:36,010 --> 00:26:38,803 ♪ We can watch it grow ♪ 712 00:26:38,804 --> 00:26:42,515 ♪ For all of our tomorrows ♪ 713 00:26:42,516 --> 00:26:44,517 ♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪ 714 00:26:44,518 --> 00:26:47,230 ♪ The summer come and go... ♪ 715 00:26:48,023 --> 00:26:49,480 Just that. 716 00:26:49,481 --> 00:26:51,608 ♪ You'll never be alone ♪ 717 00:26:51,609 --> 00:26:55,236 ♪ And when there's nothing left to do ♪ 718 00:26:55,237 --> 00:26:59,157 ♪ Keep looking out the window ♪ 719 00:26:59,158 --> 00:27:01,159 ♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪ 720 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:07,160 ♪ Till everything's coming up roses ♪ 721 00:27:08,543 --> 00:27:11,210 ♪ I ♪ 722 00:27:11,211 --> 00:27:17,211 ♪ I know our fears have been kicking up the dirt ♪ 723 00:27:19,262 --> 00:27:25,262 ♪ I push them down because it's only gonna hurt ♪ 724 00:27:27,187 --> 00:27:29,312 ♪ I know days are moving slow ♪ 725 00:27:29,313 --> 00:27:31,314 ♪ Slow ♪ 726 00:27:31,315 --> 00:27:33,483 ♪ Both our heads are hanging low ♪ 727 00:27:33,484 --> 00:27:35,318 ♪ Low ♪ 728 00:27:35,319 --> 00:27:39,699 ♪ I just wanted you to know ♪ 729 00:27:41,242 --> 00:27:44,494 ♪ After all that we've been through ♪ 730 00:27:44,495 --> 00:27:48,498 ♪ I still want to take a walk with you ♪ 731 00:27:48,499 --> 00:27:50,583 ♪ Into the garden ♪ 732 00:27:50,584 --> 00:27:52,752 ♪ We can watch it grow ♪ 733 00:27:52,753 --> 00:27:56,130 ♪ For all of our tomorrows ♪ 734 00:27:56,131 --> 00:27:58,174 ♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪ 735 00:27:58,175 --> 00:28:00,927 ♪ The summer come and go ♪ 736 00:28:00,928 --> 00:28:04,138 ♪ Looking out the window ♪ 737 00:28:04,139 --> 00:28:06,224 ♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪ 738 00:28:06,225 --> 00:28:12,225 ♪ Till everything's coming up roses. ♪ 739 00:28:12,564 --> 00:28:18,564 Go to bed.